Help?! I think I'm a side chick ...

Hello! If you clicked on this link to learn more about what it's like being a side chick - welp, you came to the right place! Time and time again I have found myself falling into the same role, dealing with the same type of niggas ...the ain't shit type! Haha, naaa but for real. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've been lied to by a nigga who either: had a girlfriend, had a main chick, or just some other hoe that I didn't find out about until it was too late. Too late? What do I mean, it's never too late to leave a aint shit nigga, right? .....WRONG! I mean too late to the point that I've either caught feelings for the nigga, or just wasted too much of my time on him, or worse ....I've already told my friends about him. & if we're being honest the last one is definitely the worst! There's nothing hurts more than having to renege on your joyous declaration of, "I think I've found the one," to the group message after who you thought was "yo boo" turns out to be someone else's.

With Valentine's Day just on the horizon I want to help out my fellow side chick's who might need that extra sign from God ...to let that nigga go! So listen up, sis! Here's a few things to peep if you feel that this message is for you.

DATE NIGHT

As a generation, we have redefined what it means to be dating someone: from the talking phase all the way to the ground breaking 'what are we' moment. However, we haven't been able to define is what is a proper date. Although some demand $200 to be spent on them in order for it to be considered a date, whereas, others would beg to differ and consider 'Netflix and Chill' a date. However, let's just be honest honey, if all y'all ever do is 'Netflix and Chill' then something might be up ...okay, let's throw out the 'might' and just say that this is definitely a RED FLAG!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that he has to take you on a $200 date ...I'm just saying every now and then you all should be leaving the 2 mile radius around his house - to get food and back to the crib. Also, don't let him put you under constrictions (i.e. I can only see you on this day at this specific time). Switch it up - you pick the time, date, and place sometimes and see how he reacts. If he "can't" do it, then try again a different day and time - if the answer doesn't change, let's take a step back another look at it. The next thing I want you to think about it is how he much he is on his phone ...

PHONE TELLS IT ALL

If were being honest, how a nigga uses his phone when he's with you is one of the earliest indicators as to whether or not you are being played. When you two are together, does he have a tendency to keep his phone away from you? Or does the phone always get placed face down, so that if he gets a notification he can do the flip 'n check before responding? When you two are apart does he respond as quickly as when you are together and you see him check his notifications or does he wait a while before getting back to you? Now I'm not talking about when he's at work or blatantly busy ...I mean when his response was "chilling" but doesn't seem to really be doing that. If you had second thoughts about any of the above - you may be a victim, sis. Which brings me to my last point ...


SOCIAL MEDIA

Let's not forget about our old faithful friend, social media. Have you noticed that when you all go out on dates, that you never seem to make it into his IG or Snapchat feed, but everything else surrounding you has managed to make a debut? ..I know you didn't think it was cause his niggas wouldn't approve cause we all know that's a lie. We both know why he isn't posting you, sis. Don't settle for that. Give him the chance to make it up to you after bringing it to his attention. BUT THE NEXT TIME you see your food make an appearance on his story and you don't see yourself in it ...I'm sorry to tell ya sis, but you gotta let it go. Now don't get me wrong, there is definitely a grace period that we have to give niggas - but whenever you feel that it's getting a little repetitive, then it might be time to move on to another nigga.

Now don't get me wrong, just because a nigga is doing all of the things listed above - doesn't mean that he has another woman ...BUT from my limited years of being a side chick to niggas, these are definitely some prerequisites to be mindful of.

But now that we have some guidelines to weeding out the real from the fake, don't waste ya time honey ...RECLAIM YOUR TIME 2018! Valentine's Day is right around the corner and you can either save yourself the headache and aggravation that you will face by prematurely cutting that nigga off - or you can ignore the signs. Go ahead and get ya nails done, hair done, everything did and sit in your room on the 14th while he debuts he main on social media for all the world to see.

Ehh, the choice is yours ...I'm just shedding some light from one side chick to another. I hope this holiday season brings you nothing but love and reclaimed time.

Yours Truly,

Breology